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so i'm sick again, which sucks. i think i caught a cold from my mom because she was sick and then i got sick right after. plus i haven't been leaving the house much, so where else would i have gotten it?

my mom doesn't understand where colds come from. she thinks you get them from sleeping in front of fans, leaving your hair wet for too long, and walking around the house with no shoes or socks on. she scolds me every time i do any of these things but just this morning i woke up and walked to the bathroom and on the way noticed that the front door was wide open. i asked my mom if she'd done it on purpose and she told me yes, because she was going back out in a minute. i shut the door anyway and she didn't leave for another half hour. so to be clear, fans are dangerous but leaving your front door open for 30 minutes while you are in a totally different room is completely safe. moms, right?

i was supposed to start university this spring but i decided to wait until the fall. i'm just so burned out. it seems like a petty complaint but i haven't taken any time off for nearly 3 years and i'm tired. anyway, i hate doing things i don't want to do just because i think i'm supposed to. when i took a year off after high school people complained at me about that, and then it turned out that i didn't even make it a year before i started to really want to be in college, so when i did finally go to school, i was really enthusiastic and i put in a lot of effort and i enjoyed what i was doing because i felt like i had a choice in the matter.

i think during my semester off i'm going to do some volunteer work. there's an organization here that helps sexual assault victims and does education and outreach and that kind of thing that i'm really interested in working with. also, planned parenthood is nice because they sometimes give their volunteers a stipend. it's not much money usually (last summer i think i got $35 for 5 hours of work) but it'll be good to save up. and the experience will be good for me. so i have some stuff to look forward to.

though right now i have some leftover pizza to look forward to.


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