.

sometimes i feel happy because i think i fit in and people like me. other times i'm sure everyone only tolerates me out of pity and i feel a sense of desperation because i've always thought that if i could just find people who i had things in common with, i would feel like i belonged. today i feel the second thing.

i had planned to drive up to charlotte to do some birthday shopping, but i'm so tired and i'm sick of interacting with people, so i'll go tomorrow instead. my birthday is a week from today.